How to Overcome Obstacles Using Reframing Practically

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Transcription

Today I want to share something, it is actually an answer to a question that a couple of my friends brought up on a post I put up on Facebook a couple of months ago.

The topic is relieving stress in our lives came up and this one person, one of my friends, she wouldn’t tell me exactly what it was, but she said basically there is nothing she can do about the situation she is in.

[shareable]Reframing can help you find solutions to real problems. @Abe_Stone[/shareable]

She can’t really change it. She feels like she needs a patience or a little more wisdom and is just putting up with it.

I wanted to give her more, something that would help her out.

I suggested the idea of reframing and working with paradigms, and paradigm shifts. I know that sounds like coaching mumbo jumbo.

Then another friend joined in and made a few suggestions as well and said, “Abe can you explain a bit more about reframing?”

So, I decided to do just that on this video for her, so this is for you and for anyone else who is looking for a way to use this tool to change their perspective.

Now, I will break this video up into three parts.

The first part is just kind of understand, “What are some of the situations where you can find reframing useful?” Where you can use it in your life.

[shareable cite=”Abe Stone”]What are some of the situations where you can find reframing useful? @Abe_Stone[/shareable]

The second one is about understanding the principles in reframing.What is really going on? What is happening in your mind and in your thoughts? Where is that position that you are in coming from?

The third one is a tool that you can use to take action, to start reframing any situation, you can use it even to help a friend, just by asking the questions, even if you don’t know what their problem is. Helping them to ask those questions and find the answers to them.

You can see how this can help other people in your life as well.

[callout]CLICK HERE TO INSTANTLY DOWNLOAD OUR FREE CHEATSHEET

“5 STEPS TO FINDING SOLUTIONS WITH POSITIVE REFRAMING”[/callout]

So here goes.

Three Areas Where You May Use Framing

1. One of them is limiting beliefs.

I just can’t do this.”
That is not possible.”
I’ve never learned how to do this.”
I don’t have the skill or the talent.”

Well, those ideas, those thoughts that you have and those beliefs that you have can be changed.

2. Now, another situation that you might find useful is a situation that is okay but it could be better.

Let us say that you miss out on a situation like a family gathering. You really didn’t want to go. You wanted to be somewhere else at the time. You decided not to attend, then people come back and say “Wow, we had a great time! You won’t believe what happened. ”

You will think:

Oh, I got left out. I missed the opportunity.”

So that is one situation.

4. Another one is when you are facing real problems and you need to find solutions.

And it is not just a matter of positive thinking, but it is a matter of finding a new answer, a new approach, or looking at it in a different light, or a different way, and making those situation work for you.

Three Principles Behind Reframing

Alright, now let us talk about the principles.

This first one is very important.

Situations and events in our lives don’t really carry any meaning other than what our mind attaches to them.

Our thoughts attach meaning.

The mind is a constant meaning making machine. It is always trying to size things up and put them in some sort of organized fashion so that it makes sense, so that the world makes sense, but it doesn’t necessarily means that the conclusions are right or that it is good or that it is bad. Or that it really deserves any judgement, for that matter.

So that is one thing that is always happening in your mind.

Another principle that is very important to realize when working in reframing and trying to understand this tool is this.

Our thoughts have an underlying set of beliefs and assumptions that make that thought viable, that make it important to us.

It either gives us direction, or it holds us back.

In some way, events and situations in your life have created that frame from experience and beliefs that you have collected either from your parents, from things that you’ve been through, from your teachers, from mentors or maybe just from making a mistake one time and then it was set.

You didn’t realized that there were other ways of looking at it, other ways of thinking about things.

Now another principle that comes into working with reframing is that all of our thoughts have some positive purpose in our lives, even if it they seem negative.

[shareable]All our thoughts have a positive purpose in our lives, even if they seem negative at first. @Abe_Stone[/shareable]

Maybe it is to protect you from danger or harm or maybe it is to get you out of a difficult situation.

In some way, even those negative thoughts are trying to serve a positive purpose in your life.

Don’t forget to download the free cheat sheet, “5 Steps To Finding Solutions With Positive Reframing.”

Five Questions to Help You Reframe a Problem or Situation

Now, we are at the last short section of this video. These are five questions, which I think you are going to find very valuable.

This is actually your action step that you can start to use right away to turn around those situations in your life where maybe just a little bit of change of perspective, a new paradigm will be the solution that will get you through to the other side of whatever it is that your stuck with, whatever it is that you’re struggling with.

The first question to ask yourself is:

Question #1: What am I really trying to accomplish by solving this problem (or finding a new shift in my view of situation)?”

The second one is:

Question #2: What kind of limitations have I self-imposed on this situation or my thoughts about the situations and are they real? What happens when I take one away and the another one away? What happens if I take them all away together? What would happen to the situation like then?

Alright, now when look at a situation or a problem, ask this third question:

Question #3: How can I chunk this problem into four or five smaller problems that I can solve individually?”

[shareable]How can I chunk this problem into four or five smaller problems that I can solve individually? @Abe_Stone[/shareable]

Alright, now the fourth one is.

Question #4: What if I choose not to solve this problem at all or change anything at all, and just move on?”

Okay, here we go. Now here’s the fifth one.

Question #5: What if I am the problem? Who else can I delegate this problem to or who else can I get to help me to look at this situation?”

In some cases, maybe a friend. In other cases, it might be a coach. You just need their help you work through this.

Either way, you have five great questions that you can start using right now to shift your ideas, shift your perspective and find new, empowering perspectives for whatever situation you are in, even if it is something you feel you can’t really change.

If all else fails, go and work with someone else.

Find a coach.

Or, work with someone who has faced your problem before, and can offer you advice and help your through it.

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Okay, so here is a quote to wrap this up.

Our lives are not determined by what happens to us but how we react to what happens, not by what life brings us but the attitude we bring to life.”

Wade Boggs

The affirmation for today is:

[shareable cite=”Abe Stone”]When the stresses of the life confront me, I relax and out everything into proper perspective. #affirmation[/shareable]

Alright, I hope this video was of help to you and your understanding of how reframing work and how you can use it as a tool in your life.

 

[callout]CLICK HERE TO INSTANTLY DOWNLOAD OUR FREE CHEATSHEET

“5 STEPS TO FINDING SOLUTIONS WITH POSITIVE REFRAMING”[/callout]